By the Wanz
(Well, at least the cab drivers of Tacoma, Seattle, San
Francisco, Oakland, and the rest of the Bay Area.)
Hey
there, it’s me again, Wanz, your loyal passenger. I know sometimes I turn down
your services for the bus or walking or my friend, but I do want to let you
know that I appreciate you, whole-heartedly.
That
being said, I wanted to touch base with you to give you some constructive
feedback. Yes, yes, you saw right through me, I’m giving a positive-feedback-positive
sandwich… I learned it during supervisor training, and honestly, it’s fucking
effective. Being the vocal, web-based person that I am, I wanted to write you a
letter that just broke down some wants and desires I have for you. Now I know you have some feedback of your own (but
unfortunately, yall don’t connect and have a semi-successful blog that
criticizes your passengers… or do you? Do you? Am I in it? Can I
be in it? J) but today, it’s about my feedback for you as my driver… consider this my “Top 5 Requests of my
Cab Drivers.”
Firstly,
I’m going to provide this brief critique. Honestly, if I am making a very
strange request (locationally speaking) I get it if you don’t know where you’re
going. However, when I ask you for a pretty basic location… one would hope that
you know where you’re going. If not, I understand, but it’s always a little
unnerving when I find myself having to instruct you, my driver. I mean… that’s
what GPSes were invented for… directions… you even getting out a map wouldn’t
be super reassuring, but it’s more reassuring than you going “Uh, ok…” starting
to drive and then me having to point out “you are definitely going the wrong
direction.”
Second
of all, I am going to admit, this is primarily me being an asshole, but some
days I’m in a chatty mood, some days I’m not. Unfortunately, it’s up to you to
gauge that. Some days, I’m ok with you asking away about my backstory, and some
days I’m chill with listening to your rambly life story, but other days, my
general body-language should be screaming “No! NO! I don’t want to talk!!
NAY!!!!” and on those days, you just need to accept me for being who I am, and
let me be. You feel me?
Third
of all, if you’ve read my other post about taxicabs, you already know that I’m
not a fan of drunk taxicab drivers. Nothing against you personally… well,
actually yes, a lot against you personally. If I had wanted to get into a car
being driven by a drunk driver, I would’ve asked my friend Pat to drive me.
He’s been drinking all day. And guess what, I’m in this cab right now because
I’m relying on you to be my sober driver. Too much to ask? If it is, then…
well, I’m just not getting your ride. Sorry.
Fourth
of all, and this may be making me the asshole again, a title that I’m willing
to both accept and embrace, but let me know if you don’t take credit cards. I
come from San Francisco, and for the most part, I’m usually carrying cash in
anticipation of cabbing home, however,
if you have the little VISA/Mastercard logo and several blocks into the ride
you’re like “Oooooh….. about plastic……. Yeeeeaaaah….. [insert awkwarder
pause]….. I don’t take that.” Then I call bullshit on you good Sir/Madame.
(Though now that I’m thinking about it, I’ve only had male drivers… what’s that
about guys and gals? Societal norms need to change! Starting on a cabby-level!)
Anyways, don’t make me a bigger asshole than I already am, and just be upfront
about it so I don’t eject myself from your car, screaming
“Eeeeaaaaggggglllleeeee” and then having to tuck and roll. (Eagle was a Scrubs
reference… I officially will tip my fro to
anyone who go that.)
Lastly,
speed and directions… I pretty much need you to be breaking laws for me if I’m
hailing you midday, because that means I’m late. (If it’s a latenight cabby
moment, I’m just drunk and need to get home.) So, drive as fucking fast as you
can without being pulled over or killing anyone. Being a witness to driveby
murder isn’t really in my life itinerary. And directionally speaking, please
just go the fastest route as possible. Nothing miffs me more than noticing that
you’re taking a long route just to milk
the money I’m already spending on you.
EVEN though I already
said last, this is just kinda PS note, that just because I’m black, doesn’t
mean you should ignore. I’ll pay you. Just stop when I’m waving my arms,
attempting to hail you. I swear, I’ll pay… I swear…
Sincerely,
Wanz
of Life in Transit
P.S. Do you feel like I’ve misjudged you? Have you received
other letters from other passengers? Do you have words to say? If so, you
should let me know!! Prove it.
P.S.S. To prove it, you should share your experience on our
blog or our twitter account at http://twitter.com/LifeInTransitTJ
or on our facebook at http://www.facebook.coom/lifeintransittj
or send us an email at LifeInTransitTJ@gmail.com
and we may post your message / picture!!
P.P.S.S. BYE AGAIN!
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