A Total Hip Trip!

By the Wanz

            It wasn’t until I arrived at my Seattle-bound busstop that I recalled that today (08/19) was Seattle’s Hempfest. I deduced this upon seeing an influx of Friday morning commuters, most of whom were younger, a lot more hippie-er or hipster…er, and saw through eyes way more glazed over than our average transitter.

            I groaned. Though I’m not one to venture to the fest of the hemp, I’m (relatively) fresh out of college and from San Francisco, so I’m all for love (and drug?) embracing celebrations. Ultimately, this was just my usual naptime (that which I desired the most that morning after a fun – but late – night out) and I sighed, knowing it would be skipped today. Aside from the crowd, I hoped my quote-of-the-day notebook would be brimming with material and quotes galore!! (Spoiler alert: this is the only thing produced from m Hempfest ride.)

            As the bus pulled up and I dashed to stand at the front of the line, I glanced back at those behind me and saw more unusual transitters from the buswindows—the crowd consisted of flower-power children, teenage hipsters, twenty-something year old hippies, way older hippies, odors, gigantic backpacks, thick blankets, etc. It was, by far, one of the weirder groupings of people in all of my transit history. As our bus left Tacoma, this was the populous that journeyed with me north:

·               I sat in my favorite seat beside Rev. Old Dude (a regular commuter with me), who hid behind books and newspaper to escape the youngsters and the strange black guy (me) beside him;

·               Standing in the aisle was a cadre of teenage hipsters (one of whom had a hate that said FUCK on the underside of his cap’s brim, all of them wearing tight pants, and a bizarre color pallet akin to color combos worn during the original era of Saved b the Bell);

·               Two heavily tatted, somewhat grungy guys, rocking the hooded, patchy sweatshirt combo with a patch of “SKULL LICE” on the side (is it a band? a funny saying? a store? or maybe even a way of life…), and gigantic backpacking packs;

·               Beside those two was a twenty-something year old hippie-esque chick heading into Seattle for work (a fellow transitter aka’d as Hippie Chick);

·               Two foul mouthed street slang kids (teens I’d guess) sat / kicked the seat behind me;

·               Three middle age women from out of town traveling up to Seattle;

·               And, of course, me (the Wanz) the young guy with the fancy shirt and a tie on that day. (In their eyes, I was probably “cooperate” or “the man” even though I work at a non-profit.)

Now I have worked in the downtown financial district of San Francisco, Tacoma, and Seattle so I’m rather use to the regular judgmenty-tension between the younger, rebellious generation against the pretentious, better-than-though, don’t talk to me while I’m on the bus adults who view the kids as smelly, slackers with unrealistic expectations. I’m not sure if it was just the setting of the bus, the fact that I was coming into work a little later in the day, the fact that there were only a few of us “corporate types,” or maybe it was the slight smell of weed (coming from most or all of the Hempfest travelers) that calmed the population. Free love and hippie-ness reigned supreme over our ride!

Hippie Chick was in love with the kids’ outfits and reasons for going to Hempfest (recalling her own teenage Hempfest days); the cadre of teens chatted up a storm with Hippie Chick and the middle age women, who had no freaking clue what Hempfest was—it was pretty cool to see these teens (who had gave up their seats for these ladies) and then dropped some knowledge bombs about Hempfest; there was obviously me and Rev. Old Dude who said nothing, though I quietly listened and jotted down some notes; the Hippie Chick also got the backstory of the backpacking duo (in town from Portland, excited about the music scene in Seattle); and the middle age ladies learned about the Good Will store that Hippie Chick got her shoes at. All in all… a strange level of kindness.

I quietly observed and didn’t interact (again, wanz was tired). Unfortunately (sorry Leighann!) there was very little recorded. This was not due to laziness, this was truly due to the fact that TEENS were around me and teenagers can sometimes say funny, quote-worthy things but most of what they say are:

1)            Quotes from movies/shows/songs or actual funny people

2)            Long-winded inside jokes that don’t even make sense

3)            Simply not ver funny.

In fact the only quotes I retrieved were these:

“Stonerkid (as a bus full of little kids drives b): These look kids look like dammit!”

“Kid1: I just love you so much I’m going to point out your faults. Kid2: Yeah, well, I don’t like you pants so… shut up.”

Yay Hempfest busride!! If you had a funny experience or even picture on the bus during Hempfest, tweet us at file:///LifeInTransitTJ or send us an email at LifeInTransitTJ@gmail.com and we may post your message / picture on our twitter or blog!! 

The Art of Catching the Bus On Time...ish

by the Wanz

Firstly, this isn’t rocket science; this is merely a grouping of suggestions/advice for how you can actually get places in a timely/effective manner via the bus. That whole point of this is to develop a concept of what I call “accountability.” (I totally invented that to btw.) Countless times have I heard people bickering or bitching at bus stops or on a late bus, loudly grumbling, “Well if my bus hadn’t come 15 minutes late, I would be on time!”

I call bullshit! J You clearly are willing to allow your life to be left in the hands of someone else who drives you around. It’s not like the busdrivers are you personal chauffeurs—it’s public transportation people! Things like traffic, mechanical issues, fights, accidents, wheelchair / stroller lifts, etc. occur on the bus, car, train, on pretty much a day-to-day basis. So, if you’re willing to travel by bus, you have to accept these facts, thus place the blame elsewhere and not on the bus and/or the driver. Boom! Accountability.

[The only exception would be if you were waiting at the very first stop and you saw the bus driver just kickin’ it or eating or talking on his cell—doing something other than driving the bus—when it should be taking off. Dillydallying, if you well. Even then, you have placed yourself in that position. Gotta deal.]

In all honesty, the person you really need to be mad at is yourself for not getting your ass to the bus on time. There, I said it: it’s your fault. But, let’s put your complaints away and remedy this! Read on for my general timely transit suggestions.

1)    What does “on time” look like to you? – No, this is a serious question. Before you even ponder about the bus, your bus route, your general travel time, etc. take a deep breath, close your eyes, visualize your destination and think “When do I really need to be there?” Once you have decided that, subtract 10-15 minutes, and that’s when you should want to be there. Because let’s be honest, be it on the bus or by car and you’re a commuter, you really have no clue when you’ll get somewhere due to traffic, accidents, and general dumbasses out there on the road.

2)    Map out your route – It’s important to have this all sorted out the night before, so you know where to go and how to get there. Don’t be that guy/gal looking around being like “is this my busstop is?” That’s unnecessary.

a.     If you have a connecting bus route, make sure you map it out, figure out how long it is between your bus and the connecting bus, and that you have more than enough time between buses to appropriately catch it and have emergency back-up routes just in case.

3)    Try catching on bus early – If you’re legitally wanting to be somewhere on-time (especially by bus), be early. Figure out which bus you should catch (based upon suggestion 4) and try to catch the one before. It eases on the stress. Otherwise, continue to read on for how to promptly arrive on time.

4)    Arriving to your bus stop – This is the biggie step. In the many-a-years I’ve taken the bus, I have been wronged every which way by the (bus) system. Sometimes the bus comes early, sometimes the bus is horribly late, and sometimes the bus doesn’t come at all (a real rarity, but it happens). Transit’s Law says that the arrival of the bus will always beg against you so don’t you think for a second you saunter up to your bus stop and expect it to be waiting for you. So remember the following:

a.     Have all of your shit ready the night before – Lunch, gym bag, work stuff, clothes, homework, whatever you need. Just be prepared. If you forget to prep stuff, this could easily lead to your untimely undoing!!

b.     Arrive at your busstop 10-15 minutes prior to your bus’s arrival – AND THERE IT IS!! This gives you an adequate amount of time to leave your house. Honestly, if you get there around this time, you may accidentally catch an earlier bus that’s running late and you may catch your bus if it arrives early. Now, obviously, if your bus comes late, you’re SOL but at least you anticipated arriving to work 10-15 minutes early (see 1^st recommendation).

c.     Powerwalk! This isn’t some motherf**king morning stroll – I’m not saying run, but move quickly if you want to catch your bus! Hell, I take it back, if you know you’re running late, then you run motherf**ker, run!

d.    Be kind to your busdriver, even when they’re late – This is important. For the days when the bus is über crowded / late and it’s supposed to pass you up, if you’ve developed a good relationship with your busdriver, then they may stop for you even when they aren’t supposed to. (Or even if they see you sprinting after the bus to catch it they may slow down.). However, if you’re a dick, they’ll happily skip over you, in most instances.

e.     Take the bus with someone – This is always the kicker, because if you take the bus with someone, you start to have an obligation to be there on time so you can commute with this. (Be careful with this one, cause it can easily become a double-edge sword if this friend becomes an ex-friend/hook-up/girlfriend and/or boyfriend.)

[Irrelevant Author’s Note: I’m writing this entry on my commuter bus and my laptop was almost chucked to the floor, thanks to a kind-hearted, hard-breaking busdriver… grrr… if this breaks or I accidentally get a concussion, raaaaage!!!]

Ultimately, the moral of this entry is this: be a little early for the bus. What’s the worst thing that could happen? Hell, if anything, maybe you meet a cute guy/gal at the bus, and you strike up an interesting conversation! And then bam! you have a new bus-friend, more accountability, timeliness, who knows, even a (bad) bus romance — shaboom!

If you follow all this and you still don’t get places on time, then maybe you should just buy a car. Or a helicopter so you can avoid traffic. Or move. Or make your job move. No, can’t do anything of that? Then stop complaining and catch an earlier bus! J

If you have your own tips for getting to work on time via bus, or a funny transit tale or picture, tweet us at https://twitter.com/LifeInTransitTJ or send us an email at LifeInTransitTJ@gmail.com and we may post your message / picture on our twitter or blog!!